30-Second Version For Busy People

When you do something good, there's a natural urge to seek recognition. We want to hear our parents are proud, our spouse say thank you, and others give us credit. But don't taint the good you've done by seeking what's called the third thing—credit or a favor in return.

You helped. They benefited. Don't seek a third thing. 

When Christians get better, everyone gets better. And right now, the world needs better Christians.

Full Version

Nothing good comes from chasing gratitude and recognition for what you've done.

I find this corruption in my own heart. I do something of mediocre value—give someone solid advice, tell a funny joke, offer to pay for someone’s meal—and immediately look around for recognition.

Even as I write this I shake my head, ashamed of how extra I can be.

Last month, I was in Liberia, leading a team on a 12-day mission (am I seeking your recognition?). We visited an orphanage, educated the teachers, hosted a medical clinic, and spent quality time with the kids. One of my team members pulled me aside with a child who needed a sponsor. She wanted to take up the financial responsibility, handed me cash, asked me to take care of it with the administration, and requested her name be kept out of it.

“This is not about me,” she whispered. “This is all about Jesus.”

I think about this moment often as I try to keep my left hand unaware of what my right hand is doing. The desire for recognition for the good we have done has a name: the third thing.

BETTER THOUGHT

Today's better thought: I do good because I am good, and everything else is extra.

The Bible reminds us in Matthew 6:2 not to sound the trumpets announcing when you have done something good. Jesus also reminded his followers that when one looks back behind them when plowing, they allow the horses to drift.

So it goes when we look back and admire the good thing we have done, relishing the specialness or generosity. It's a distraction from moving forward.

You want credit. You want gratitude.

You want what Marcus Aurelius called "the third thing” because you're not content enough with doing.

You helped. They benefitted. The third thing is credit for the good deed or a favor in return. Change this mentality. 

Of course you did good! Of course you helped someone or cleaned something up or took the blame when it wasn't your fault. You are walking in the steps of Jesus who showed us it's good to be good.

Who better to do it than you?

BETTER ACTION

Today's better action: Do something good with a smile and expect nothing in return.

I'm thinking of a question that changes my day whenever I ask it: Who is my person today?

This is a simple prayer you can begin saying each morning: God, who do you want me to reach out to today? As soon as that one person comes to mind, I do my best to send them a text, give them a call, or write them a letter at some point that day.

It might be your Uber driver, grandchildren, or nosy neighbor next door. But we do good because we are good, and we reach out and bless these people because it is a good thing to do.

When people notice that you took the time to stop and recognize them, they are actually witnessing the love of God shining through you. That is evangelism. It's not some big, scary church word. Evangelism is simply being a witness of God's goodness to other people.

Take a moment right now. Pray for God to put someone in your heart. When he does, stop and send them a note. Do it with a smile and no expectation of a return.

Hit "reply" and let me know how it goes.

BECOMING A BETTER CHRISTIAN

When Christians get better, everyone gets better. Here are a few ways I am getting better this week.

• I just finished reading Ryan Holiday's new release, Right Thing, Right Now. It was a considerable source for today's topic on the third thing. Here's a good summary quote from the book, “In a world of so much uncertainty, in a world where so much is out of our control, where evil does exist and regularly goes unpunished, the commitment to live rightly is a redoubt in the storm, a light in the dark.”

• I wrote A Story on Purpose as a practical first step for people tired of drifting through life. As a thank you for being a subscriber, I'm giving away the free digital version of the book. Download yours here.

• I heard from many people who joined me in praying the Lord's Prayer every day for 30 days. Here is an added component: say it while kneeling. When was the last time you got on your knees in prayer? It's humbling.

Hit "reply" and let me know what you're doing!

Trivia — Something I Wish I Said

Here is a quote that got me thinking this week. Who do you think said it?

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